William and Kate - The Anti Royal Wedding Song

William & Kate

I hope it rains on your wedding day
I hope the food goes off and the dress disintegrates
I hope the caterer rings to say
Someone has pissed in your Beaujolais
And your Granny tells you she aint gonna abdicate


I hope the heel breaks on your shoe
I hope you're covered in pigeon poo
Westmionster Abbey falls down to the ground
I hope your champagne bubbles pop
I hope a frog jumps down your top
And your greedy little friends don't hang around

I hope your face is covered with spots
Your head is hit by a flowerpot
I hope your hair falls out and the pair of you are bald
I hope the flowers don't arrive
I hope they wilt and don't survive
And I hope the whole day ends up being spoiled


On your honeymoon you lose your ring
And there's no air conditioning
I hope the sun goes in and the rain keeps falling down
I hope your hubby gets into a fight
I hope the midges start to bite
And I hope you get accosted by a clown

I hope you're covered in feathers and tar
And someone spits in your caviar
And you find out that dear Kate has a sordid past
I hope there's no beer in the bar
And there's itching powder in your knickers and bra
But most of all I hope this marriage doesn't last !